Love and Marriage

We like ceremonies and celebrations. We scoff at ceremonies like coronations, inaugurations, society weddings and other public celebrations, but only after we had watched them, so that we can ridicule the detail. We silently place ourselves in the place of the main characters in the celebration, and wish for our own turn.

I remember when Prince Charles and Princess Diana got married. At the time I was working as a civil servant in South Africa. For one day, we were allowed to break all the rules. I had a portable television set in my office, and we gathered around it all day so that we would not miss even a tiny detail of the broadcast. This was years after South Africa became a republic, and we had no official ties with the royal family. It did not matter. We were caught up in the magic.

I recently heard about a man who spent that entire day in bed with his girlfriend, now his wife of many years. They obviously had their own magic going on that day.

In England the expression "getting a hat" means that a couple has decided to get married and it is time to prepare for a celebration, part of which is to buy a hat to wear to the ceremony.

Nowadays a wedding is preceded by months of planning and huge expenses. Everything has to be just right, and there are even mock weddings before the day so that every participant can remember their steps for the big moment.

Sadly, the cost of a traditional wedding and the emphasis on the legal aspects of the wedding put people off the idea of marriage. Add to that the high divorce rate and the negative emotions that go with divorce, and marriage becomes a lot less attractive.

A website that i refer to on my blog contains a lot of amusing and eye-opening information about the various traditions that go with the modern Christian wedding ceremony. Virtually nothing of the ceremony has anything to do with being Christian - or belonging to any other faith group.

Considering that marriage is not even mentioned in the Bible, it is interesting how much emphasis the churches and even some governments place on the institution of the Christian marriage as a means of controlling relationships.

Among all the fuss, we miss the point. Does it really matter what style the wedding dress is or which side the groom stands on? What difference will the honeymoon destination make to the ceremony, except to cause stress when the couple are probably already not quite keeping up with expectations?

What is far more important is the celebration of joy and happiness when two people find each other and decide to be a couple. And that does not need to be celebrated with pomp and ceremony.

There is the modern practice of dating many people and having no-strings-attached sex with various partners. As a friend of mine once put it, there is nothing wrong with good, happy, healthy sex, no matter who your partner is. That would not work for me, but who are we to judge one another? I once read somewhere a very cynical definition of love: when two people wake up together in the same bed in the morning and neither wants to leave, they have found love. Such occasions probably call for a minor celebration, but I wonder.

On the other hand, we have all seen couples that are radiant together. They clearly belong together and they want the world to know this. Now that is a celebration. I mean every time they are in the presence of others and their happiness spill over to other people, there is a celebration of love. Whether they ever get married or not becomes irrelevant.

I once had a colleague who had that kind of love with her husband. They both had successful careers and they had two lovely children. Because of discriminatory tax legislation, they had to pay a huge penalty for being married and successful. They got divorced and did not tell anybody. She confided in me a few years after the divorce and I wondered how she could be so matter-of-fact about this. This was when my own acrimonious divorce was still fresh in my mind.

Then she invited me to their house and I met her husband - and all became clear to me. They had been together for nearly thirty years, and they were still in love and acting like newly-weds. There were moments when nobody else existed for them in the room. I realised that what they had was a meeting of souls, and that the angels celebrate with them every time they are together. That is when I put in my order for a similar relationship, and the angels listened.

The union of two souls is a celebration. Does it matter whether the union is between a man and a woman, or between two people of the same sex in a relationship? Not for me.

And this union does not only happen between couples. I have seen the same thing with a teenage girl holding her mother's hand in the company of other adults. The girl was a stunningly beautiful, well adjusted young lady who was quite comfortable with expressing her obvious love for her mother in this way.

I have seen two sisters with very different characters embrace each other for no specific reason. And that was not a once-off occasion. Those sisters are both married women today and will still walk through the proverbial fire for each other.

I have a friend that has shared my path with me for over fifteen years now. We live on different sides of the world, grew up in vastly different cultures, and she smokes like a chimney, but I was with her when she waded through hell and she has been there for me during my worst and best times, often without question, sometimes with strong criticism, but always with love. The bond between us transcends all differences and our differences enrich our friendship.

And I am fortunate enough to be able to often associate with kindred spirits that radiate this kind of love. Namaste to all my free flying friends out there!

No document or ceremony can capture this kind of love, and when it happens to you, you will know, because the room will be full of angels. When you find such love, hold on to it.

[credits to goarticles.com]

LOVE IS................?

Every person has its different perception regarding the true meaning of LOVE.
Each of us has different opinions/thinking on how much LOVE can affect our daily living.

With the world drowning in a sea of hatred, oppression, war, starvation and any manner of atrocities towards our fellow man, the question begs if we can behave in this way then how do we manage to include the word "love" in our vocabulary. Never the less it is there and we use it when we refer to our families, close friends even our pets, but what is love? We struggle to describe love but there can be no doubt it exists in all of us. For example the boy who drowned in the Queensland floods of January 2011. When rescuers offered to save him from his parents sinking car he made them take his brother first, then he was swept away to his death. And we can all relate to the gut wrenching feeling we have when we know someone we love has been hurt physically or emotionally.

According to wiki, Love is an emotion of strong affection and personal attachment. Love is also a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection; and "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another". Love may also be described as actions towards others or oneself based on compassion, or as actions towards others based on affection.

Love in its various forms acts as a major facilitator of interpersonal relationships and, owing to its central psychological importance, is one of the most common themes in the creative arts.

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How to Deal with Jealousy

According to wiki, Jealousy is an emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, particularly in reference to a human connection. Jealousy often consists of a combination of presenting emotions such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness and disgust. It is not to be confused with envy. Jealousy is often reinforced as a series of particularly strong emotions and constructed as a universal human experience; it has been a theme of many artistic works that seek to privilege monogamous discourses. Psychologists have proposed several models of the processes underlying jealousy and have identified factors that result in jealousy. Sociologists have demonstrated that cultural beliefs and values play an important role in determining what triggers jealousy and what constitutes socially acceptable expressions of jealousy. Biologists have identified factors that may unconsciously influence the expression of jealousy. Artists have explored the theme of jealousy in photographs, paintings, movies, songs, plays, poems, and books. Theologians have offered religious views of jealousy based on the scriptures of their respective faiths.

Before anything else, you need to have peace of mind. You need to have positive outlook in who you are, in your strengths, capabilities and qualities. You might want to know what you put forth to the table. If you don't understand what these qualities are, then sit down and write them down. By being healthy and at ease, you wouldn't feel inferior. You would not look and feel the need to continuously look over your shoulder or have the need to study your partner's every move. If you do not currently have this reliance in yourself, you will likely end up doing damage to your love affair with your irrepressible envy.

In order to deal with envy, you might need to remember where you're coming from. For example, do you actually feel envious if you learn your better half going out with the opposite sex? Does this emotion come from the truth that that he or she is lounging around with the opposite sex and your spouse is heterosexual? Or is there an issue regarding his or her action that concerns you? How does he or she do things? Is your boyfriend or girlfriend fairly enjoying a good time? Is your lover flirting or in fact specifically passionate with most or all of those people? If you come to experience that your envy is rationalized, you are required to have the braveness to question your loved one. If he or she is showing rich emotions towards someone else, you need to confront him or her.

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SOUL MATE?? Really?

Do you beleive in SOUL MATE?

Have you met her/him already?

According to wiki, A soulmate (or soul mate) is believed by some to be the person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity, similarity, love, sex, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, or compatibility. A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul, which is thought to be the ultimate soulmate.

We all have several, and sometimes many, soulmates in our lifetime. Many of you are currently in, or have been, in a romantic soulmate relationship before. So, what were you doing when that soulmate came into your life? Now we don't mean, were you sitting at a table in Starbucks slugging down a White Chocolate Mocha. It is much deeper than that. What were you doing with your LIFE?

Soulmates tend to find each other during their respective pursuits of their soul missions. Creating a soulmate could be seen as a spiritual reward that we give ourselves, after pursuing many soul contracts rife with discord.
~Linda Brady

Were you sad, depressed and lonely from a recent relationship breakup? Did you look at the floor as you shuffled through Wal-mart to get the week's groceries? Did you spend weekends wrapped up in a blanket, schlubbed on the couch eating bon-bons and watching Lifetime movies wishing you were the heroine?Did you find bathing, washing your hair and other grooming essentials just too much effort because you were not in a relationship? Did you just stop caring about yourself...because you lost yourself somewhere along the way? Do you think this is the right energy to put out their to find your soulmate?

Love Spells to get your EX back

Whether you were dating or married, losing the special man in your life can be devastating.

Perhaps you thought you would be able to "get by" without him, but now you realize that's not the case.

You feel as if you could just about do anything to get back together; you have even considered getting some free love spells to get him back.

Casting spells is an ancient practice, and love spells were among the strongest cast, at least according to the people who believe in such things.

The truth is that those types of spells are not worth casting, but there are, in effect, many spells that can and do work.

It all comes down to how you define a spell.

For our purposes, a love spell is anything that captivates a person and causes them to have romantic feelings for you.

Here are a few sure-fire free love spells to get him back:

1. Play hard to get. Nothing drives a guy crazier than pretending like you're not interested.
It's as though his animal instincts kick in and he has to start hunting his prey.
In this case, the prey is not some wild animal, it's you!
You do need to be cautious when using this love spell.
If you play too hard to get, then he may give up the hunt and move on to other prey.

2. Be positive.
Guys don't like women who are emotionally needy.
Yes, a lot of guys do like women to depend on them, but only to a point.
Being negative, whining, complaining, and downright miserable all the time will only push him away.
In other words, he won't want to get back together with you.
On the other hand, if you can be positive, upbeat, and cheerful, then he will find you irresistibly attractive.

3. Stick to your word.
If you say you're going to do something, then do it.
It doesn't matter how big or small it is, you must keep your word.
In fact, a good way to get him back is to make small promises, and then follow through on them.
He will appreciate that you're a person of your word, and that will count as a mark in your favor.

4. Be yourself.
While you may feel as though you would be willing to say or do anything to get him back, you need to make sure that you stay who you are.
If you pretend to be something you're not and he decides to take you back, then you will either have to keep living a lie, or you will eventually have to come clean. Neither of those things are a good option.
Besides, you're an awesome person, and he should want you for who you are.

Those are just a few free love spells to get him back, and while they don't rely on sorcery, they will work like magic.

How to Fix your Marriage?

To start with, you need to know whether the marriage is worth putting all the extra effort into. As long as your partner is showing signs that they want to work on the relationship as well as you, then you have a good chance of being successful. But if your partner has clearly stated that this is the end, then you will need to respect that and give them some space.

You may know of other couples who have remained together just because it may be the easiest option, or because they don't want to upset the children involved. But these reasons are not always enough. Having your partners commitment to equally working on mending the relationship is a fantastic start to working things out.
Figuring out what the exact problems are in your marriage, is your next step. This step is important to get right as the symptoms of some problems can easily be mistaken for the problems themselves. An example which many of us confuse for the cause of many break ups is an affair.

An affair is just a symptom of another problem in your relationship. A partner straying can be caused by actual lack of intimacy. In this example, the cause of a break up was not the affair itself, but the little intimacy.
The most important thing you can take from this step is to deal with the underlying problem to stop any nasty symptoms from occuring. Focusing on the core problems will allow you to save your marriage.

Once you have pinpointed the core issue, you need to begin to talk about it. Let your spouse know exactly how you are feeling and then listen to how they are feeling. When you have your feelings on the table, it is a lot easier to start putting a plan together to fix your problems.

Then take steps towards putting your plan in action. One idea is to put aside one night a week for you to spend time together, preferably alone. And lastly, mending your relationship will not happen overnight. Keep in mind that there will probably be more tears, as well as laughter, to move forward. You will need to remain patient along the way and be ready to apologise quickly.

How to Please the Man in Your Life

I've been reading and searching different write ups and articles on how to make my husband happy. The man I exchanged vows with is so much more than just a provider and a pair of useful hands around the house. He is someone who is always there to cheer me up whenever I'm feeling low, and celebrate with when the good times are around. I love him so much, I really want to know what are the things I need to understand and learned because I know that this maybe the time to do something fun and unexpected to gladden my husband's heart.

Below are some of the list that really caught my attention:

• Start with a love letter. Remember how eagerly you waited in the early days of your courtship to receive a letter or just a note from each other? Do it again, but this time count all the reasons, which you think make him the best husband. Your man will not only be happy to be reminded of your love but glad to know that he makes you happy as well.

• Listen actively. When your husband expresses an opinion or a thought, pay attention. This shows you respect him and his views and nothing pleases a man more

• Say thank you with a smile. When your husband does an odd job around the house, thank him like you really mean it. He will know that his help is not taken for granted and he will be happy to do more.

• Prepare his favorite meal. After he returns home from work on an ordinary day, surprise your husband with his favorite dinner.  He will not only be glad to have the food he likes best, but will appreciate the time and effort you put in preparing it.

• Hold his gaze. When you are speaking to your husband or listening to him, make sure that you keep eye contact. This will assure him of your attention and your respect, which is empowering to any man.

• Ask his family over. Your husband’s parents mean a lot to him. So ask them over for a Sunday lunch he will be touched by your loving gesture.

• Do something he hates. Choose a chore, like buying grocery or taking out the laundry, your husband really dislikes doing and then go on to do it cheerfully.

• Appreciate his interests. If your husband is into carpentry, praise the bookstand he has made, even if it wobbles just a wee bit. Or if he loves collecting coins, buy him a book on numismatics. Your interest in his hobbies will give your husband a feeling of pride and make him happy.

• Tell your husband to take a night out with his pals. Not only will he have a good time, but he will also be grateful for your thoughtfulness.

• Find a quiet moment with your husband to whisper “ I love you” in his ears. If you have already said it, say it again. You can never say these three words too often and you can be sure, that every time it will make your husband glad, he married you.

• Put on your sexiest lingerie and get ready for an intimate evening with your husband. He will be happy to know you still desire him as a lover.

• Flirt with your husband in front of his friends. Hold his gaze, touch his legs under the table and steal quick kisses. Your hubby will love to relive the days of romance.

It doesn't take much to make your man happy. Unconditional Love and sincere appreciation are what most men expect in a partner.

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About the Author

Hi everyone! My name is Lyn, graduate of Bachelor of Science major in Biology. 

I am previously working as Laboratory Analyst in one of the biggest manufacturing company in the Philippines. 

I love science & health so much. 

I am here to discuss you different things that has something to do with RELATIONSHIP. I'm a full time housewives to my ever dearest husband MD and a part time scent maker.

Hope you'll support me with my journey. 

Your ideas, suggestions & concern are well appreciated on this blog.

Keep a marshmallow warm with a fire.

Thank you!